Crisis of Faith/Crisis of Love

Chapter 13

by Fr. Thomas Keating

The Movement of Hope to Love

We have taken note of a number of people in the gospel, all of whom might be characterized as wanting something: the royal official, the centurion, Martha and Mary of Bethany, Mary Magdalen, the Canaanite woman and the penitent woman. These people all asked Jesus for something. They endured suffering and humiliation in order to obtain some favor in contradistinction to those many persons whose prayers he just answered. Jesus took these in hand, so to speak, leading them step by step from a weak faith to a strong, living faith--a faith which he gradually transformed into hope. The result of their hope in him was the complete turning to God, a conversion in the full sense of the word. This is the final resolution of the crisis of faith.

The original message of the gospel, remember, is: "Do penance, for the kingdom of God is accessible, nearby."42

"Do penance" means "be converted," or "have a change of heart." It does not mean "do this series of religious exercises, endure this series of trials, find yourself this degree of austerity," but "allow your inmost heart to be changed."

This is the ripe fruit of the crisis of faith. It changes radically, inwardly--most inwardly--our values, our faith, our hope, and our love. Mary of Bethany turned to Jesus from the depths of her being after she saw her brother come forth from the tomb. She achieved in that moment the total dedication of herself to God. She expressed it by the lavish gesture of pouring over him the expensive perfume at the supper in Simon the Leper's house.

We identified the crisis of faith as the first part of the growing up process. There is a further crisis which should be pointed out in order to understand fully "the breadth and length and the height and the depth"43 of the love of God. It corresponds to the passage from adolescence to adulthood.

The second crisis is the purification of love.

Do we need a purification of love?

Recall the incidents of Mary of Bethany, the Canaanite woman, and the penitent woman when she received the assurance of the forgiveness of her sins. The wave of gratitude pouring into their hearts, causing them to overflow with love and praise, must have been something that did not wear off in a few hours or a few days. It established each of them in a stable union and abiding with Christ. Practically speaking, they hoped in his mercy, a hope which henceforth made them strong despite discouragement, trials, difficulties, and even the death of the Lord himself.

Let us suppose then, that, by the grace of God, we have experienced our hope and trust ripening into love. We know we love God and are seeking not so much his favors, but himself. Would you think that such a strong love still needed purification?

Let us look at Mary, the mother of Jesus.44 One might think that she at least was perfect in love from the beginning. But God's idea of love is different from ours.

If we presume the validity of the Infancy narratives, the Holy Family went dutifully every year to the temple at Jerusalem according to the Jewish custom. On one occasion when Jesus was twelve years old, he disappeared. Mary and Joseph had started home and had gone a day's journey before they missed him. they retraced their steps to Jerusalem to seek him. they searched for three days. It was a preview of his death for Mary, and for Joseph, his last great trial. After that we hear no more of him.

We are tempted to ask the same question that she did when she finally found her son. Why could not Jesus have told her what he was going to do? Nowadays if a boy runs away from home, he is considered a disturbed child and is liable to wind up in the hands of a social worker.

They searched far and wide for him.  When loving parents have lost a child, each one's sorrow increases that of the other. they must have been distraught after three sleepless days and nights. Their astonishment can well be imagined when they found him in the temple, in the midst of the rabbis, apparently having a very good time. Whether he had been arguing all that time, the gospel does not say. In any case, we are told that everyone was charmed with his intelligence and his answers.

His parents were overjoyed to see him and embraced him. Mary could not resist just a work of reproof in spite of her joy. She said to him the ordinary thing any mother would say to a child who had run away from home or disappeared without saying anything: "Son, why did you do this to us? Our hearts were heavy, your father's and mine, as we searched for you!"

Even Mary could not hide her feelings at this moment. Her sorrow had been so great. Just speaking of it eased the tension. But he showed no sign of apologizing, and have every evidence of being quite satisfied with the situation.

Then comes an extraordinary statement. Only God could administer such a rebuke! Here is a broken-hearted mother, his own mother, and Joseph, trying to hide his own feelings. Jesus says, "Why did you look for me? Didn't you know--" in other words, you should have known--"that I had to be about my Father's business?"

"But they did not grasp the meaning of the reply he made to them." They were stunned.

Having made it perfectly clear where he stood and where they stood, "He went down to Nazareth and was subject to them." That was his Father's business for the moment--and indeed for many years.

Mary must be the one who related this incident to Luke. Perhaps she wanted us to know that she, too, had to be reminded that God's will has to come before every other duty and affection, including the most legitimate, including those willed by him, such as the love of a son for his mother.

Mary, according to Roman Catholic doctrine, was not subject to original sin and its consequences. All her feelings and emotions were submissive to her will. She was a perfect child of grace. But even she needed to e reminded by Jesus of the primacy of the Father's will. Although she was perfectly united to that will during the trial of search for her son, she was confused by his conduct towards her. As in al the cases of his enigmatic answers or seeming rebukes, the reply of Jesus was an invitation to t new abyss of purity of heart, to a new expansion of divine love. he reminds his mother: "Don't forget, I'm not just you son. I must be doing the work my Father has entrusted to me."

Notice the implication that Joseph is not his father in the ordinary sense.

Jesus had always been a dutiful son up to this point. Did they need to be reminded that he belonged not so much to them as to the Father, and that the Father's will must come before everything else, including them?

Of course, how could they know--he was only twelve--that the will of the Father was going to require this special mission of his Son and leave them out in the cold?

This same sort of situation is going to happen to us also just when we think we are loving god to the best of our ability and are experiencing his love for us. Just when things are calm and quiet, and when we have successfully passed through trials of faith and reached what feels like an unconquerable hope in the Lord, all of a sudden, for not apparent reason, comes a new call to purify our hearts and open them to the inner searchings of divine love.

When this gospel is proclaimed in the liturgy of the Christmas season, the prayer of the day asks that we e shown, "the good, acceptable, and perfect will of God." This prayer suggests that there are three degrees of submission to the will of God. The good will of God is his will above every other affection. And the perfect will of God is his will above every other love including ourselves.

In Mary there was never any doubt about her submission to God's will from every point of view. Yet God willed to go on perfecting the purity of her adherence to his will. 

Jesus went down with her to Nazareth and became once again a dutiful son--until the moment he had to leave her permanently in order to bring to completion the redemption of the world.

Footnotes:

42  Matthew 4:17.
43  Ephesians 3:18.
44  Luke 2:41-52.

More information can be obtained by reading the book Crisis of Faith/Crisis of Love by Fr. Thomas Keating.  It is offered in our